Believe it or not, there are plenty of people out there who think that stress is a mere figment of the imagination.
I’m pretty sure that these are the same type of people who didn’t believe in shell shock and who claimed that so-called ‘madness’ was just a feminine ailment. I’m here today to confirm that stress is well and truly in existence, is willing to target any unsuspecting subject and is bloody hard to combat!
Naturally, it’s largely wedding related. I’m honestly trying my hardest to accommodate people and to remain open minded and calm but it’s remarkably hard. A few week’s ago I was on the phone to one friend trying to alleviate the situation and as soon as I managed, I had to hang up because I was nearly home and had to calm things down there as well. Gosh, it’s hard.
Today I got off to a bad start with a disagreement with someone. I went for my usual swim but just focused on swimming for relaxation (distraction!). I did feel a bit better. Then I spent a large portion of the day in the city centre running errands with my mum. But I could just feel the stress niggling away at me. Like tiny little creatures burrowing under my skin. I felt sick to my stomach and I was unsure of how to combat it.
Despite this, we managed to have a really productive time. Got most, if not all of the things we needed – and a few extras! Then I went for a relaxing pot of peppermint tea with my friend. Poor soul had to bare the brunt of my anxieties! It was lovely to see her and I did feel a bit better until my mum contacted me to say we’d left a bag in one of the shops… and she had already gone home but had to return to town as she’d bought the wrong thing for herself! Everything turned out well in the end. But I’ve come home to more worries and I can feel the back of my neck in knots. I just feel like a massive weight is pushing down on me…
I guess my question is: what are your top tips for stress relief?
Ms Katykins 
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:11
Walking. Writing. Valerian root – it’s an herb and it helps.
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:13
All sage advice – thank you!
I am going to go and google that herb now! 
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:14
There’s also a valerian root tea. I’m not a big tea person so I haven’t tried it though but you seem to like tea so maybe that might be good for you.
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:16
Thanks for the suggestion! I really love tea, so that could work really well for me. You’re a gem!
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:17
You have every reason to be stressed right now more than most people I would venture to say. Making time for relaxing things like swimming is a great idea. At least your stress will result in a good thing right!!!
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:40
Thanks, Carla! I actually wished I could have gone back for another swim today – there have been a few times this week when I’ve felt like this.
The problem is that I am affected by other people’s feelings. If someone’s annoyed or upset then I’m feeling it too… I need to learn to curb that.
Thank you!
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:42
oh yeah, all that negative stuff. I guess you must make a real effort to bring in some positive thoughts somehow. You are in my thoughts xx
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:50
Aww, thank you! I shall try hard! x
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:21
My mother had a mantra, one that is very popular: “This, too, shall pass.” And ya know, she was always right. Face your problems head on if you must, use swimming as your meditation, and maintain a sense of humor. I find that the last one serves me well.
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:42
Thanks, Jilanne – I really appreciate all of that!
I think your mother is absolutely right! As for the humour, a laugh is exactly what I’m in need of right now! 
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:36
Hello Ms Katykins,
Sometimes you have to be horribly hard nosed about situations. You MUST remember that your wedding is for you and your husband – you are just inviting people to share your joy! You do what YOU want to make your day special, take account of what people say but still do your own thing. Remember, they can do what they want for THEIR OWN weddings/celebrations but this day is for YOU! Now – tell everyone that you have your own plans and would like everyone to respect that; then relax, enjoy the rest of your planning and smile! I’m sending you a virtual hug honey x
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:49
Aww, thank you so, so much.
Good, good advice that I must take! I just try to hard to please people…! The hug is appreciated as well. Did I tell you I’m coming up for a visit in ten days or so. Would be lovely to grab a cuppa with you and have a proper catch up (I’ll limit wedding chat, lol!) if you’re free? 
x
February 5th, 2013 at 18:05
Hey, that would be great. It would be so good to meet up AND you can talk about your wedding all you like; I won’t mind one little bit! Remember, I’m the one that eloped because I’m such a woos (is that how you spell that?) and wanted to avoid any stress inducing scenarios!
February 5th, 2013 at 18:12
I think you had the right idea!!!
Fantastic, I would love to see you and to hear all your news! Just let me know when suits you. I should be pretty flexible. 
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:42
1. Ring a friend who will let you rant and who will sympathise with you (preferably someone who has organised her own wedding). Have a laugh (or a cry) about it.
2. Decide to devote an evening to yourself and go the whole hog with bath salts, glass of wine, watching a comedy wearing pyjamas, or whatever.
3. Book yourself a massage.
4. Take a half day with your fiance to do something quirky and simple and remind yourselves why you are getting married.
5. Extreme suggestion: try total honesty with the people who are getting in a flap. Tell them the tension of trying to keep everyone happy is getting you down, that you’re trying to accommodate everyone but at the end of the day it’s your wedding.
6. See if you can delegate more (if you’re not a control freak). Sometimes people like being given a task and it keeps them happy.
There are so many others I could mention, but different things work for different people. I hope you manage to cope with the stress and get everything done.
February 3rd, 2013 at 19:17
This is absolutely fantastic advice, Sophie – thank you so much! I think I really need the massage! Never had one, but my neck is so knotted! Lol!
Laughter and relaxation. Honesty – love it! Will maybe try that (tentatively!). You’re a real gem, thank you!
February 3rd, 2013 at 19:51
NEVER HAD A MASSAGE? Scandalous. Put it on your wedding list.
February 5th, 2013 at 18:11
LOL! I think I will have to!
February 3rd, 2013 at 18:59
Oh yes, there is stress. No doubt about it, sweetie. Laughter is a stress reliever. Go see a funny movie – by yourself if you have to – in another town if you can, where you won’t know anyone. Just so you can laugh as loud as you want. Orrrr, while you’re swimming, screammmmm as you exhale in the water. You’ll crack yourself up!
February 3rd, 2013 at 19:21
LOL! You really did put a smile on my face there, thank you! I think laughter is a definite must! Will need to look for any excuse to do that!
Thank you! x
February 3rd, 2013 at 19:52
Red wine. Or white.
February 5th, 2013 at 18:13
Copious amounts!
February 3rd, 2013 at 20:46
when you find out let me know
February 5th, 2013 at 18:34
Lol, will do!
February 3rd, 2013 at 23:23
Ah yes, one of my closest friends is getting married in a few weeks and she’s so stressed with it all, various people complaining about the arrangements because they don’t suit them, jeez! People are so selfish sometimes.
Relaxing and finding ways to unwind are of course good ways to counteract stress, but for me I find that one of the most effective ways is to take practical action. Whatever is causing the stress, I write down a list of practical things I could do to resolve it (I know you like lists!). At first your list can contain completely ridiculous things that you would never put into action, but just write down every action you can think of that would go towards sorting out the thing that is causing stress, and you will definitely find some things in there that you really can put into action. Just feeling like you’re trying to tackle it rather than letting it happen to you can help.
February 5th, 2013 at 18:37
This sounds like very practical, sensible advice – thank you.
You can tell your friend that she has my sympathy.
I thin I am trying too hard not to offend people from invited guests to people I’m working with… it’s remarkably hard. Might be time for Bridezilla to come out!
February 4th, 2013 at 19:42
Stress is horrible! Do something you love. I read, write, go for a walk, talk to a great friend and pet Nash. Sometimes if I’m really stressed, I torture Brian with a rant about whatever is bothering me and he’s such a wonderful guy that he listens and when I’m done, will try to offer some help. I hope that whatever you do it will help. Weddings are stressful but they shouldn’t be! Hope you’re having a good day
February 5th, 2013 at 18:43
Thanks so much, Trish! These are all really good suggestions!
I should probably try them all. The bad thing is that I start to feel guilty if I’m not being busy enough – crazy, eh?
Thanks!
February 5th, 2013 at 17:57
I’m an expert on stress
But walking, a good book or movie and lots of tea usually helps me
Pre-wedding jitters. This too shall pass, Kate…
February 5th, 2013 at 18:48
Lol, thanks for making me smile, Maggie!
I shall follow this advice!
February 5th, 2013 at 20:37
Oh, boo, Kate! I’m so sorry you’ve been stressed, but see you’ve received lots of good advice here. I’m just sending loads of good thoughts your way and hoping you drink a lot of tea. After the wedding, you’ll surely wonder why you let yourself get so worked up, but we all do it. xoxoxo
February 6th, 2013 at 13:42
Lol, you are so right! People keep telling me it’ll be over soon enough. That’s not what I want – I want to enjoy it! Tea is definitely helping and you’re right, great advice! Thanks for the good thoughts! x